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Over the summer of 1980, I became obsessed with Star Wars thanks to the release of the second film, The Empire Strikes Back. As a result, both my English and Topic books (the ones in which I was allowed to write whatever I want) are swamped with Star Wars-related material. One of the most prevalent (and least entertaining) is the recurring comic strip Daft Vader (who starts out as plain Darth Vader, and finally ends up as Daft Ada), so I thought it a good idea to present an example. This is one of his earliest, in which he meets a new original character of my own devising called 'Thing' (whose tenure on this Earth was, as with most of my characters, incredibly short-lived.

 

Believe me, one of these is all you need to see. The others are no better (probably much worse) and contain nothing more than rudimentary jokes and cartoon violence. Vader is portrayed as a put-upon, gormless idiot, with occasional bouts of extreme rage. As for Thing - well, he's only really a character design and this is the only time he really gets a character of any kind, but it appears he does actually have a character of sorts - even if it consists of the exact same traits of most of my characters from around this period - impatient, violent and unfairly vengeful.

 

My favourite part of this story - and the bit that genuinely makes me laugh, for all the wrong reasons - is the penultimate frame: "Two years later..." - WHY does Vader wait two years before moaning about the spider? What does he do in that time? Does it really take that long for a spider infestation to take hold in someone's flat? Is it even possible for such a thing to happen without constantly feeding them? In short: what the Hell was going on in my feeble, 8-year-old brain?

This Must Stop! (Sept 1980)
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My Wellington Boots (July 2nd, 1980)
Daft Vader & Thing - Page 1
Daft Vader & Thing - Page 2
Apofh
frem Uota Speace
Arp 41, 1809
Stupid Characters
starring Darren Spitfield!
June 1980
THIS MUST STOP!
This Must Stop!
Sept 1980
My Wellington Boots
A thrilling shoe adventure
July 2nd, 1980
The Looney Game
A Game for Stupid Nutters
Sept 1980
Gary Le Strange relaxing in the Comedy Store
Grobschnitt was one of the few characters I did actually return to
Darren Spitfield is just one of many (well, five) stupid characters depicted in this pointless page-waster
THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP! THIS MUST STOP!
A jolly tale about a pair of flying sentient wellies that blast into space and get into trouble with the space police for killing some astronauts - but everything's alright in the end when they're back at home, safely reading their army comics
The Looney Game - the winner is the first to get to Square 32 and stay there