A few days later and I'm still writing about 1793. Or is it 1794? Or 1974? In fact, there's part of me that wonders if I ever stopped writing at all, because this is almost exactly the same story, with the same lame jokes and the same rambling, manic stream of consciousness. But this one's slightly better somehow.


For starters, it's much shorter. That has to be a good thing. But it also does another thing - it's like it's broken through some kind of psychedelic threshold. Yes, it's still just a lot of bad jokes, but it's also a story that starts off by arguing with itself, not just about what time period it's set in, but also whether or not it's a short story or actually a film. The story has, somehow, become self-aware.


The bad jokes persist and they're just as badly written, but somehow they fit together better, forming a freewheeling tale in which the writer rides a bicycle around the inside of a cat's head, making friends with a swallowed mouse until the pair of them decide to go for a picnic in the cat's nose.


"It was very realistic," says the storyteller, and I suddenly find I am no longer reading the desperate attempts of a ten year old to make me laugh, but the genuinely insane ramblings of a truly bizarre little boy. The dark side has returned - there is body horror and blood lust, and they all die at the end - which, alongside the terrible puns and the genuinely omnipresent theme of cycling, all adds up to a genuinely surreal experience.


Or maybe it's just rubbish. Who can tell?

Christmas Already? (Dec 14, 1982)
Back Up Top
Stand and Deliver (Jan 25th, 1982)
The Bikeling Club - Page 1
The Bikeling Club - Page 2
The Bikeling Club - Page 3
Stand and Deliver!
Your mummy or your wife!
Jan 25, 1982
New Wave Daft Characters
Just what we needed!
Jan 1981
Backwards Castle
A backward step?
Jan 27, 1983
Christmas Already?
New school, new rules?
Dec 14, 1982
How to Be Nutty
My comedy manifesto
June 11, 1981
Another from Love Lane, featuring the hilarious vampire "Count Backwards" (yawn)
One of a handful of comical tales I wrote at Love Lane Juniors in Pontefract
Gary Le Strange relaxing in the Comedy Store
The most effort I've ever put into the most useless shit
The glorious personal vision I had on the road to my own Damascus - the Damascus of comedy!
Stand on your liver! Your mummy or your wife!