I must admit I had to think long and hard about whether to upload this. A completed
book which acts as a dictionary and handbook to a made-up language (part Yorkshire
dialect, part Waen Shepherd's weird 12-year-old brain), this is exactly the sort
of thing I expect people to glance at once and immediately decide that I think I'm
some kind of clever dick who needs bullying and insulting every day on Twitter. Obviously
a parody of the French, German and Latin textbooks I had just started using in language
lessons at Park High School, it's the sort of thing only a clever dick with an academic
interest in language and an overconfident sense of their own funniness would do.
And such people usually need beating up or shouting at until they give in and admit
they're not as clever or as funny as they used to be.
Then again, I look at this and I think, who else would have the patience to do something
like this? Who would bother to start it or even have the idea in the first place?
The language is completely impractical, mildly satirical but, on the whole, the main
impression I get from this is that only a madman would write it. Seriously - to write
this (and probably even to read this), you have to be a disturbed nutter of the highest
order. And somehow that balances it all out, so I thought what the Hell? Upload it
- show them all just exactly how anally insane you could actually be.
So here it is, in all its glory - possibly the most pointlessly insane thing I have
ever done. Except of course this, this, this, this and this, and probably this. Please
don't try it at home.